Remember The 5 Love Languages? The premise is that people perceive and show deep emotions through five distinct love languages. The names are trademarked, of course, but they boil down to doing favors, enjoying intimate moments, giving gifts, sharing kind words, and spending time together.
It turns out that romance scammers often use tactics akin to a “love language” as well. But unlike the romantic behaviors in the book, a scammer’s love language isn’t meant to gain empathy or understanding. Scammers just want their victims to be besotted and vulnerable as quickly as possible so they can steal their money or identity and move on.
So, who are the people getting scammed? How do scammers groom their victims? To find out, I asked Ashley Rose, CEO of Living Security, an online security training firm, what people can watch out for as they seek their soulmate online.
How to Avoid Online Dating Scams
Decoding the 5 Love Languages of Romance Scammers
Rose told me that sometimes, there are warning signs that may indicate an online scam is afoot. I’ve boiled these signs down to five love languages that romance scammers may use when luring a victim on a dating app.
1. Acts of Speed
Scammers usually try to lock down the relationship quickly. “Scammers [are] trying to get your heart connected. They’re saying, ‘I love you,’ and they’re moving very fast in the relationship,” said Rose.
2. Receiving Money
Money requests in any form are a giant red flag when it comes to online dating, especially for older victims. “Don’t send money to anyone you meet online,” Rose said. “That should just be across the board.”
3. Requests for Information
Sometimes, your personal information is even more valuable to a scammer than cash. Rose said, “Things like your birthday, your Social Security number, your banking information—all of that can [allow] the scammer to take on your identity.”
4. Faked Photos, Videos, or Voice Calls
Generative AI tools help anyone, including online financial scammers, create believable fake profiles on dating platforms. They can use real people’s photos and videos posted on social media platforms to generate new audio and photos that appear indistinguishable from reality. Scammers can even use AI to impersonate people on video calls or live video streams. In other words, be careful, because you can’t know if you’re being catfished or defrauded until you see your lover in the flesh.
Always verify whether the person sending you photos is the person you’re speaking to online. Rose said, “If they’re sending you images, you can do reverse image searches on Google. Many of these scammers are taking people’s pictures from social media accounts or somewhere else online.”
5. Virtual-Only Touch
Be wary of people who always have an excuse not to meet in person. “If you’re trying to meet up and you set a time and date, and then, ‘Oh, I have a business trip that came up,’ or somebody got sick, or this happened, they’re avoiding in-person meetups,” Rose said, warning of common red flags.
The Most Popular Online Romance Scams in 2026
Don’t feel bad when you realize you’re talking to a scammer. According to new research from McAfee, 53% of American survey respondents say they’ve been asked for financial information or money while talking to someone they met on a dating site. These requests came via QR codes or links sent via direct messages, email, or text. Don’t give them what they want! Here’s a rundown of other scam attempts to watch out for on dating apps this year.
Fake, AI-Generated Photos and Profiles
McAfee’s survey results reveal that 35% of Americans who use dating apps have encountered fake or AI-generated photos or profiles. Men (27%) are a lot more likely to report an AI catfish profile than women (19%), though they’re also the ones who are encountering them a lot more often (30% as opposed to 20% of women surveyed).
Younger people are also in scammers’ sights now. About 1 in 3 adults under 45 say they’ve encountered fake or AI-generated profiles while browsing dating platforms, with 21% of people aged 18 to 24 saying they encounter possible romance scammers every day. Survey respondents older than 45 said they encounter fake dating profiles far less often, though it’s unclear whether they were correctly identifying fake or AI-generated photos and profiles.
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Automated AI Scams
These days, scamming has less of a human touch, as would-be criminals simply outsource much of the pesky, time-consuming social engineering tasks to AI chatbots. That’s right, all a scammer needs to do is use AI to create believable, personalized dating profiles on a few platforms, and then deploy bots to keep conversations going with an unlimited number of victims.
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After the AI establishes trust with its suitor over days or weeks, the conversation shifts from family planning to financial planning. Suddenly, the lover will claim a medical emergency or another desperate situation, such as needing a travel visa to stay in the country. The “relationship” ends when the victim hands over the money, and the chatbot stops responding. Sometimes online scammers return to their victims after the initial payment, only to request more money for different ailments or emergencies.
Phishing Links to Membership-Only Dating Sites
In the age of Raya and a plethora of other members-only dating apps catering to the most attractive, famous, and wealthy people, it’s no wonder some scammers are getting in on the trend, spamming dating sites with phishing links to fraudulent platforms. In fact, one in three McAfee survey respondents said they received an invitation to an “exclusive” or “invite‑only” dating app, and 14% even signed up and shared payment information.
Pig Butchering Scams
There’s also the threat of the oh-so-unappetizingly-named “pig-butchering scams.” Interpol asked us to refer to these crimes as romance baiting scams, not because the other term sounds gross, but because it dehumanizes the victim, and we agree.
After all, the scams are pretty dehumanizing, too. Here’s how it works: A scammer contacts their victims via a dating app, social media, or SMS and starts a conversation. After building trust, they ask the victim to download an app or visit a website to invest in cryptocurrency. You probably know what’s coming next if you’ve read this far. The victim’s banking details are entered, and the criminals clean out the money. Typically, the scammer deletes their dating profile from the platform immediately, leaving the victim high and dry.
Navigate Dating Apps With Caution
These warnings may sound a bit depressing, but you can still find love and affection online. The important thing, according to Rose, is to enter any conversation or relationship with a healthy dose of skepticism and proceed slowly from there. Scammers are usually impatient and will move on, while a real match grows at its own pace.
Ready to dip your toes into the dating pool? Use the above suggestions and check out our picks for the best dating apps.
About Our Expert
Kim Key
Senior Writer, Security
Experience
I review privacy tools like hardware security keys, password managers, private messaging apps, and ad-blocking software. I also report on online scams and offer advice to families and individuals about staying safe on the internet. Before joining PCMag, I wrote about tech and video games for CNN, Fanbyte, Mashable, The New York Times, and TechRadar. I also worked at CNN International, where I did field producing and reporting on sports that are popular with worldwide audiences.
In addition to the categories below, I exclusively cover ad blockers, authenticator apps, hardware security keys, and private messaging apps.
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