Body Language: What you need to know about body language

We achieve the opposite with the so-called “poker face”. With immobile facial muscles, we unsettle our counterparts and provoke skepticism, mistrust and distance. We convey many strong feelings through our facial expressions:

• a critically furrowed brow,

• a nose wrinkled in disgust,

• eyebrows raised dismissively

In professional contexts, a well-dosed or conscious and economical use is recommended, because “derailed” facial features quickly appear uncontrolled.

The tonality of the voice

The meaning of verbal statements can be supported with a confident, clear voice.

For example, a convincing appearance includes:

• speaking clearly

• fluent speaking

• clever use of pauses in speech

• Verbal emphasis on statements that are particularly important

• relaxed, straight posture

Better to avoid

• Raising the voice at the end of a sentence.
  It is all too easy for a request to sound like a question, at the expense of the authority of a verbal statement. Example: “Please tell me the price”.

• Mumbles and whispers
  This radiates insecurity and makes it difficult to listen.

• Excessive volume
  This can be interpreted as dominant behavior.

Learn from the body language of those in power

There are people who fill entire rooms with their presence. They exude natural authority. Their voice is firm and strong, their gestures are calm and flowing, they represent their concerns confidently and self-confidently.
For managers, this dominance is often perceived as congruent behavior and some managers may also owe their position in part to their confident demeanor.

And then there are those Body language of power. It is often used when it comes to intimidating the – subordinate – interlocutor and asserting oneself. In a conversation with superiors or clients, it is easy to determine whether the other person is emphasizing the distance and their superior position using body language or whether, on the contrary, the focus of the conversation is on the common interest and result orientation for the conversation partner.

Examples of hierarchical behavior

• lack of eye contact,

• pressed lips,

• The person you are talking to is standing while you are sitting,

• the posture is half turned away,

• The conversation partner devotes himself to another activity during the conversation (calendar, cell phone, etc.),

• The conversation partner is literally “buttoned up”.

Examples of cooperative behavior

• A facing posture and eye contact signal interest

• open position of the hands,

• standing or sitting with equal rights,

• The conversation partner repeats the gestures, inviting them to continue speaking.

The personal state of excellence

And what is the best way to approach a conversation partner with hierarchical behavior who doesn’t encourage communication at all? It is best to acknowledge this fact and not let it discourage you. It also makes no sense to waste time trying to figure out the reason for your negative (body) posture. It is more effective to use the time to concentrate on your own message and the way you communicate.

The basic requirement for a positive conversation is your own conviction? Another helpful point is the state in which the person making the request is. The following things can contribute to a positive charisma:

• An important conversation should take place when you are well rested.

• Comfortable clothing that fits the situation makes you feel safe and respectable.

• An upright posture and taut shoulders not only influence the mood, but also ensure an appropriate presence and eye level with the other person.

• A smile shows good intentions to the other person.

• Pay attention to the use of tonality of voice, gestures and facial expressions, as described in the previous sections.

Mirror, mirror on the wall…

All procedures that can have a positive influence on the course of a conversation can also be tried out beforehand in the mirror at home.

Photo: Olena Yakobchuk – shutterstock.com

This is not a guarantee that a conversation will be successful, but all the conditions are in place to represent a position as well as possible. And this coherent and clear communication – we call it “good vibration” – will be remembered by the person you are talking to. (bw)